I wrote about possible VP picks months ago, but a lot’s happened since then — like an engagement, an exorcism, and a very important haircut. And, oh yeah, Hillary dropped out. Here’s an update of some of the key players.

Charlie Crist
Recent Events: Got engaged. Supported McCain’s plan to drill for oil in the Gulf of Mexico.
Analysis: The overly tan Florida Governor ended 28 years of bachelorhood by becoming engaged to Carole Rome, who he’s reportedly been dating for a whopping nine months. No one likes an unmarried politician — especially not conservatives, who seem to think Crist might be gay. The oil drilling thing helps, too.
Chances: Up

Tim Pawlenty
Recent Events: Shaved his mullet. Made some weird comments about his wife not wanting to have sex with him.
Analysis: Pawlenty helps McCain in Minnesota but is starting to look a little gaffe-prone. Plus, doesn’t the haircut count as a flip-flop?
Chances: Down

Mitt Romney
Recent Events: Endorsed as VP by Karl Rove.
Analysis: Would John McCain let Karl Rove pick his dry cleaner?
Chances: Down

Bobby Jindal
Recent Events: Revealed that he participated in an exorcism in college and later wrote that it cured the “patient”’s cancer.
Analysis: This is pretty small potatoes, although I could definitely see it becoming late-night fodder. The real problem for Jindal is that he remains half McCain’s age — and looks even younger.
Chances: Neutral

Michael Bloomberg
Recent Events: Has yet to pick a horse.
Analysis: Survey USA “VP pairing” polls seem to help both candidates when they have Bloomberg on the ticket, at least in the Northeast and moderate states. But Bloomberg hasn’t endorsed either candidate yet. Hedefended Obama from e-mail rumors that Obama is a secret Muslim, but also offered to host an Obama/McCain town hall, seemingly endorsing McCain’s proposal. Meanwhile, he’s raising money for the Independence party.
Chances: Down

Jim Webb
Recent Events: Was doing everything an Obama VP should do: published a book, masterminded a new GI Billwhich McCain opposed — and then said he didn’t want the job.
Analysis: Apparently, Jim Webb didn’t want to be vetted. Maybe he once murdered a hobo or something.
Chances: Down

Hillary Clinton
Recent Events: Finally patched things up with Obama in Unity, New Hampshire (get it?); still, Bill hasn’t really weighed in.
Analysis: Recent polls show Obama leading among Hispanics and women, two groups that he supposedly needed Hillary for. He’s also ahead in Ohio, Pennsylvania, and pretty much every swing state except for Florida.
Chances: Down

Wesley Clark
Recent Events: Said, “I don’t think riding in a fighter plane and getting shot down is a qualification to be president.” And didn’t apologize.
Analysis: Not sure this guy was ever a contender, but this comment (which, for the record, was taken out of context) seals the deal.
Chances: Down

Tim Kaine
Recent Events: Had a spot of trouble getting his transportation bill passed.
Analysis: That’s a little wonky, even for me. Kaine remains the un-controversial white male Virginian governor.
Chances: Neutral

Retired General James Jones
Recent Events: It was leaked that the heretofore unheard-of Jones (not the author, actor, or basketball player) was on Obama’s short list. Then he showed up at a McCain event (turns out the two were long time friends).
Analysis: This was probably one of those fake names that they let out to make it look like they’re considering all options — like Sam Nunn and Evan Bayh.
Chances: Up, then Down

Kathleen Sebelius
Recent Events: Buzz for her boiled over when Obama declared his love for Sebelius on Missouri TV. She also attended the annual Bilderberg Group meeting, which apparently controls the world or something (by the by, former head of the Obama veep vetting squad Jim Johnson was there, too. Hmmm….).
Analysis: Obama may be ahead in the polls among women, but Sebelius remains a strong contender.
Chances: Up

Smokin Joe Biden
Recent Events: Has stayed relatively gaffe-prone and has been the cable TV Democratic go-to guy on foreign policy, attacking McCain, Bush, and even Rudy Giuliani. Also, he said he’d do it.
Analysis: Of all the “experienced” Senators (Bayh, Dodd), Biden looks strongest.
Chances: Up

–Hillel Aron